Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. -Ephesians 5:25-27
Men, we are not our wives’ savior; Christ is. We are not her sanctifier; Christ is. We are fellow heirs of the grace of life (1 Peter 3:7), depending on the same sovereign life-giver.
But Paul says to husbands: Watch how Christ loves his bride. Look at the cost. And look at the goal. The cost is his life. And the goal is her splendor—the splendor of holiness.
If you aim at her splendor from the top down—say, from Mount Sinai—you will harden her. If you aim at her splendor from the bottom up—from Golgotha—you will open her to sweet tastes of sovereign glory.
The key? The Lamb of God and the Holy Spirit. Know yourself broken and bought by the blood of the Lamb. And know yourself filled with the Holy Spirit.
– John Piper